Friday, March 9, 2018

The last time they saw her

Over the last two years they've seen her angry and grumpy, desperate and in pain, they've seen her in need and they've seen her confused and I just can't stop thinking about how grateful I am that the last time they saw her she was so pleasant, so kind and so stable.

We had just finished the Jog-a-thon and decided to drop off the prunes she had requested in a very unpleasant visit just a few days before and I honestly had no idea what we'd find when we walked through the door of her nursing home. But there she was, sitting in the common area watching a show about whales on the Animal Planet with a smile from ear to ear to welcome us. I told her about the kids race and she told us about how much she liked her new sweater from BA. I admired her freshly-cleaned hair and she thanked me for the much-needed prunes. She looked at each of my kids and admired them individually and then they all huddled together on metal folding chairs and watched the whale show together.

I felt the strongest prompting to take a picture, but I almost didn't do it. None of us looked all that cute after an early morning at the track and the baby was being tired and clingy and I almost pushed away the feelings with a "next time" sort of response. But then I thought of the smile on her face and remembered that in my hundreds of interactions with her over the years I had not one picture to show for it and I couldn't shake the feelings of urgency so I asked a caregiver to take a quick picture and snap! we were on our way.

That's oftentimes how it goes in life, isn't it? A little prompting. A little decision. A simple little choice that can provide such a big yield. And in this case acting on the little gave me immediate peace, but more importantly delayed relief when I realized that this photographed moment was our family's last with this friend. I have such big love for a Heavenly Father that has my back. He trusts me with impressions and I'm trying to be better at always listening, always acting and always thanking Him for the opportunity.

Two days after this picture and completely unexpectedly Anastasia was rushed to the hospital with infection. Although I spent the next two weeks ministering to her until she passed away, this was the last time the kids saw her and the only picture I have with her. I can't imagine how devastated I would be if I had pushed off this moment.

Years from now I can imagine my babies looking back at this picture of them surrounding a little South African woman in a wheel chair. I hope they remember all the service they offered her, all the prayers said as a family in her behalf and all the times they sang her hymns to provide some peace, but more importantly I hope they look at this picture and remember a Saturday afternoon happily spent by her side. And the whale show, she would have definitely wanted them to remember the whale show!

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